Ok, so it is really not going to be that long now and I am going to be a daddy to two little babies, me nervous, no. Ok maybe a little but I do also feel remarkably calm most of the time as well. Unlike a couple of months ago when I was worried we were not prepared enough and made lots of ‘to do lists’ to help us be more prepared. It is true I have developed a nervous scratch, I keep scratching the back of my head, even in my sleep, which is annoying the hell out of my partner and not doing a great deal for my scalp either.
I have also been having dreams about not having my ‘bag’ packed and ready to make a dash for it the minute I get ‘the’ call. I have decided to have one packed and ready at home and one in the office. Today I put out everything I need, almost identical items going in each bag, again freaking my partner out that I need ‘order and symmetry’ I just like to think of it as being in control….
Anyway, within weeks it is all going to happen and life as I know it is going to change, odd at 41 that it is finally happening, I can still think back to being 18 and thinking “I so want to be a dad one day”, who knew that one day would take so long to come around, but how much sweeter it is now that it is almost here.
Still don’t know if there is two boys, two girls or one of each, but I have a feeling there is at least one son and heir it there. How odd that for years I always wanted a daughter and now I am day dreaming about having a son, either way I’ll be happy. When it comes to names I have been vetoed on Rufus, and Dolly, which I can kind of understand, but I am still a little shocked that Jedi was not even allowed on the short list…. what kind of mother would not want to name her son after a Star Wars character!!!
Dad, when I think of that word now I just can’t help but smile….